Terri Apter

The Myth of Maturity

What do young people at the threshold of adulthood really need and want?

Why do so many responsible and motivated teenagers become young adults who are still dependent, financially and emotionally, on their parents? Why are many young people today so quick to leave childhood behind, but so slow to become adults?

In this wise and compassionate book, Terri Apter debunks outdated and misguided ideas about maturity: Acting in the name of love, many parents withdraw emotional or practical support, thinking it best for a son or daughter to solve his or her own problems—even to suffer alone the consequences of mistakes. Apter shows us that young adults actually need a parent's guidance and support, while also requiring respect and independence. Based on carefully observed case studies and current research, this book describes how we can support young people through a crucial stage in their development.

"[A]n insightful and compelling view of how parents can provide what the emerging adult needs to bloom."—Ruthellen Josselson, author of Reviving Herself: The Story of Women's Identity from College to Midlife

"[Apter] offers important guidelines for mothers and fathers, indicating the pitfalls and pleasures of this crucial transition."—Lynn Ponton, M.D., author of The Romance of Risk: Why Teenagers Do the Things They Do

"I wish I'd had this book when I was bringing up my own youngsters—and when I was a teen."—Judith Michael, author of Deceptions

"[E]xtremely sensible advice to parents and young adults about what they can do to temper often problematic transitions to adulthood."—Yorick Blumenfeld, author of 2099 and Scanning the Future